|
Returning Home
You may have just landed at the airport at your new host country, but it is not too early to begin thinking about the day you return home. Reflecting on questions such as "Why did I choose a study abroad program?" and "What do I want to accomplish while I am here?" can help clarify how you are going to integrate your academic, professional, and personal goals for the future. Preparing for surprises that often greet travelers after an extended period abroad will enable you to turn what can be a very awkward and distressing time into a positive and productive one.
Preparing to Return to the United States
Keeping in Touch with Home
Part of the preparation for returning home includes staying in contact with your family and friends, working on any school related matters that need to be dealt with while you are away, and to some extent, keeping up with social, political and economical developments at home. For some students these changes will be minimal; for others they will be very significant.
You should always make sure to send the Office of International Programs any address changes – otherwise, you may not receive important documents mailed to you.
Making Travel Arrangements
If you already have a return plane ticket you should contact the airline and reconfirm your seat at least 72 hours in advance. Airlines notoriously overbook flights. You may decide to travel before leaving your host country and, depending on any ticket restrictions, changing the date of your return may be subject to a fee. If you want to change the return date, contact the airline directly. They can tell you what, if any, restrictions exist. If you have not purchased a return ticket, you should book a flight at least 60 days in advance, especially if your are returning in the summer when it is high travel season in the United States and most other countries.
Transcripts
Make sure you check with the International Office or the Registrar's Office at your host school about how and when you will be getting your transcript sent back to the U.S. You may want to obtain copies of your transcript or any other relevant documents, especially if you plan on applying to graduate schools in the future. You will need to produce official copies of transcripts for applications to most graduate schools, and it could be difficult to obtain them after you have departed. (See the section on Important Academic Matters.)
Note to ISEP participants: You are required to arrange for an official copy of your transcript to be sent to the ISEP Central Office in Washington, D.C. You must also submit a Participant Evaluation form after you return home.
Housing-Related Issues
If you are living in an apartment and are required to give notice, notify you landlord in writing of your departure at least 30 days before you intend to leave (check any agreements you have signed). Determine how your last month's rent will be paid (i.e. can you use your security deposit?) and how your landlord will return to you any money that remains from your security or damage deposits (if any). Notify telephone, electric, and gas companies, or any service providers, of when you plan to discontinue your service, and make arrangements for deposits to be refunded.
Forwarding Address
Leave your forwarding address with the International Office at the host university.
Outstanding Bills
Pay all outstanding bills, including housing, library fines, telephone bills and any other institutional obligations. Your transcript may not be released until you do so.
Preparing for Reverse Culture Shock
The cycle of overseas adjustment begins at the time you start planning to study abroad. You may think that the adjustment ends when you have successfully assimilated into the life of your host country, but in fact, the cycle of readjustment continues through your return to the United States. Culture shock and re-entry shock (more commonly known as reverse culture shock) are not isolated events but rather part of the total adjustment process that stretches from pre-departure to reintegration at home. The rest of this chapter is meant for you to refer to as you prepare to leave your host county. It is important to read this section now, as well as when you are about to return home.
Change and Adaptation
You have just had the opportunity to live, study and travel overseas. During your stay you have probably assimilated some of the host country's culture, you have learned new ways of doing things and, perhaps, you have gained some new views and opinions about certain topics. In short, you have changed. As one returnee explains, "Living abroad has a deep, broadening effect on a person- an effect I didn't realize until my return." For some people living overseas and having those changes occur outside of the U.S. can magnify their living experiences, thus causing the return home to be especially unsettling. In addition, some of the experiences you will have had are specific to being overseas and could not have occurred in the U.S.
While overseas you may have experienced a greater amount of independence, both academically and personally, than previously experienced in the U.S. This independence can help to make you more confident in your abilities to achieve your goals. You may have become increasingly surer of yourself and possibly have gained a more mature or focused attitude about your future. You may even be more serious and directed. Some of these new views and attitudes may conflict with those held by family and friends. They may question your new way of thinking and doing things, or even pressure you to be the "same old you." These changes may be unsettling and uncomfortable at first for everyone involved.
Loss of Status
In your host country you may have been seen as an informal ambassador from the United States. This gave you a certain status of being "special." When you return home, you are just like everyone else and the loss of feeling a bit "special" can be a factor that you must deal with in your re-adjustment. One returnee describes it this way: "Being in a foreign country as a foreign visitor, you are to a certain extent a 'special person'; your views, accent, lifestyle are all interesting to your hosts. As such, you will receive lots of attention, make friends easily, and generally be popular. However, when returning 'home,' you become again a 'normal person.' I found it very difficult to make that transition."
Family and Friendships
Now that you have studied abroad, you obviously have a new circle of friends. You most likely saw some or all of these people on a daily basis and they probably became an important part of your life. Leaving your new friends can be the most difficult part of re-entry. Having to abandon intense friendships or boy/girlfriends, and cultural supports, frequently causes distressing feelings characteristic of those associated with the grieving process. Although you may seem to make a good surface adjustment once home that adjustment may, at times, cover contained feelings of uncertainty, alienation, anger, and disappointment.
At first, your friends back home will ask about your experiences and appear to be interested. They will often show an interest in your adventures, but this may quickly fade. They will whip through pictures and stories once, but because they have not shared the experience, you should be prepared for their cursory interest. After a while you may find that your friends are more eager to talk about what has gone on in their lives as opposed to hearing more about you life overseas. If many of your friends have never lived abroad, you may also have to deal with feelings of envy or jealousy. When you talk "too much" about your experience, people may accuse you of being elitist, even though that is not your intention. People often find new and unusual points of view threatening, especially if they themselves have not had a similar experience. As much as you need to talk about your recent time away from home, it is advisable to be sensitive to the attitudes and feelings of others.
All your relationships, those with family and friends, can alter because of the changes that have occurred in your life and the lives of your loved ones. Family members may have ideas and beliefs that conflict with yours, and friends may even have found new friendships and have priorities that differ from yours. Be patient. Family relationships will normalize and if a friendship is worth maintaining, adjustment can and will be made.
It is normal for you to desire to hold onto the person who you have become. Your overseas experience and life are now a part of you. The "new" you cannot be discarded or forgotten for the "old" you. However, you, your family, and your friends must come to terms with that "new" you and continue to build upon your existing relationship from this point forward. It will require commitment to work towards mutual respect and understanding of each other's views. You may find that you have totally different relationships.
University Life
For those of you who eventually return to a university setting after a break spent at home, you may feel that you have been able to readjust during the few months or weeks at home. However, if you return directly to Montana State University without time at home, you may face a new set of re-adjustment issues upon return to academic life. If you have become very accustomed to a different type of academic setting while overseas, you will have to deal with re-adjusting to the setting at MSU. For example, while overseas some students experience a greater amount of academic independence than they had previously experienced. If you found that academic freedom is particularly gratifying and challenging, then re-adjustment to a system that is more structured can be difficult. Returning to university life, you may feel a bit "removed" from MSU and the people around you.
Levels of Readjustment
As stated earlier, no experience is the same for everyone. You will go through re-entry much differently than someone else who has gone abroad. Research on readjustment to life in the United States after a prolonged stay abroad suggests that there are several variables that may affect the degree of difficulty faced by individuals during the re-entry. Some of these include:
Gender
Female returnees may experience more difficulty and conflicts upon returning home, if the host environment is one with a patriarchal tradition. This does not assume that they preferred the host country environment, simply that they may have to cope with more issues upon their return than men do.
Age and Academic Level
Older students or professionals who were well established in their field before their sojourn sometime experience a less troubled re-entry than younger students. Those who left home as teenagers, ready to discover new attitudes and explore new ways of living, may likely adopt the host culture's way rather than selectively integrating it with their own cultural or personal beliefs. Once home they may constantly compare home country traditions and practices unfavorably with their host country experience. This can lead to increased feelings of alienation.
Changes (or lack thereof) in the Home Environment
This variable can work in several ways. A returnee may expect everything to be the same at work as it was when he or she left. During the student's absence, there may have been subtle or dramatic changes in political, economic, environmental, or social factors on a national scale. Family relationships or the standard of living may have altered in ways not anticipated. Such unexpected changes may be stressful psychologically. Conversely, a student may return home to find that nothing seems to have changed. This can intensify the feeling that there is no one who can understand what he or she is going through.
Availability of a Support Group
Being able to share concerns with other recent returnees can help to reduce the panic, depression, frustration, and sense of helplessness that can accompany re-entry. Students who return to places where very few people have studied or traveled abroad in their particular host country may feel very alone since there is no one with whom they can discuss their concerns and experiences. It helps to locate even one other person who has done what you have, to discuss your common experiences with.
Coping Strategies
The good news is that this phase of re-adjustment to life in the U.S. does not last forever! Here are some suggestions of ways to make this phase easier on you and your family and friends:
- Acknowledge the adjustment phase
- Share your adjustment process
- Stay in contact with your host culture
- Seek out others and get involved
- Set goals for your future
Job Opportunities upon Return
Graduates who have difficulty finding an appropriate job, or any job, upon their return can expect to experience a more stressful re-entry than those who return to a past position, or to a promotion, or who are able to make a new start at an appropriate level. Sometimes, those returning to previously held positions feel that they have outgrown them or that their colleagues do not appreciate their contributions. Others may find that their host country program of study did not prepare them to deal with real conditions and resources in the home environment.
|
