More on Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence

What is Sexual Assault?
If You are Raped...
Domestic Violence/Abuse
Ending Harassment
Myths
What You Need to Know

What is sexual assault?

At the VOICE Center, we believe that part of being empowered involves having accurate information in order to make informed choices. Some of the following definitions are based on Montana legal definitions. We are available to discuss these definitions or to provide resources for more information.

We are also available for support, information, and advocacy whether or not what happened to you fits into the legal definition of rape or sexual assault. We are not here to judge you according to the law, but rather to assist you in recovering from a traumatic event.

According to Montana law, sexual assault is any sexual contact without consent. Any kind of sexual contact including touching, kissing, or fondling may be sexual assault if it is done without a person's consent.

Rape is sexual intercourse (which means penetration of any bodily orifice with any object) without consent. "Without consent" means that the victim was: 1) compelled to submit by force or threat of force; 2) that the victim was incapable of giving consent, for various reasons, including being extremely intoxicated, passed out, or asleep.

Other non-legal definitions that may be helpful to you include: sexual violence is any sexual behavior between two or more people to which one person does not or cannot consent. Acquaintance rape is non-consensual sex between adults who know each other. Date rape is a form of acquaintance rape that refers to an assault that happens between people who are on a date. Date rape is usually premeditated; the partner plans a date with the primary intent of sex, but when the date does not progress as planned the partner becomes overpowering and takes what is felt to be his or her right.

The facts about sexual assault:

• At current rates, 1 woman in 4 will be sexually assaulted in her lifetime.

• Approximately 10% of reported rape victims are male. In the majority of these cases, the perpetrator is also male, and self identifies as heterosexual.

• 84% of rapes occur between people who know each other.

• 57% of rapes happen on dates.

• 80-90% of rapes are planned, and not spontaneous acts.

What are my rights?

The following is MSU's Sexual Assault Victim's Rights Policy:

You may file a criminal charge with the University Police, 994-2121.

If you would like assistance notifying the proper law enforcement and campus authorities, you may call the VOICE Center at 994-7069. You have the right to support and advocacy from a VOICE Center advocate even if you do not want to report the assault.

You may be eligible for assistance from Montana's Crime Victim Compensation Program, which can help pay medical and counseling bills. For more information, call the Gallatin County Victim Witness Advocate, 582-2075 or 582-2076.

Upon the receipt of a complaint, the University will investigate and respond to your complaint. You may participate in any University disciplinary proceeding concerning your sexual assault complaint. You may have a support person present with you, in addition to an advisor, which may be an attorney if you are represented by one.

In the event of a University hearing on your case, you have the right to know ahead of time the names of witnesses, to see all evidence, and to question the accused and witnesses. You have the right to a closed hearing, unless all parties agree otherwise; you have the right to be seated out of sight of the accused or to participate by telephone.

You have the right to be informed, in a timely manner, the outcome of any University disciplinary proceeding.

The University will follow the direction of law enforcement authorities in obtaining, securing, and maintaining evidence relating to your sexual assault incident.

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If you are raped . . .

Know that what happened to you was not your fault. The responsibility for the assault lies solely with the perpetrator or perpetrators. No matter what choices you made or did not make, you did not deserve to be assaulted.

Seek medical attention if you are injured, if you want to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases or pregnancy, or if you think you might want to report the assault to law enforcement. Evidence from a medical exam is often necessary for successful prosecution. Remember, what happened to you was a crime. Funds may be available to compensate you for expenses resulting from the assault. Call the VOICE Center for more information regarding any of these options.

Seek emotional support. It is normal to need extra emotional support after you have been sexually assaulted. Unfortunately, for a variety of reasons, it is not always easy to get that support from family and friends. Whether you talk to friends and family or not, there are good options for short-term crisis counseling in the MSU community: a VOICE Center advocate can discuss these with you.

Your interactions with a VOICE Center Advocate are free and confidential. You may choose to be anonymous if you wish.

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Information About:

Relationship Violence

Intimate Abuse

Partner Abuse

Domestic Violence

What is intimate abuse?

This term is inclusive of relationship violence, partner abuse, and domestic violence.

Intimate abuse is a pattern of violent behaviors that occur within the context of an intimate relationship. This pattern serves to increase power differentials and dynamics of control. The couple most often becomes unable to stop the abuse themselves, as any threat to the existing power structure almost always escalates the abuse. Unfortunately, fear, shame, guilt, emotional isolation, and other factors, may keep a victim from talking about the abuse.

Why do we speak of both abuse and violence?

The two terms serve as markers on a continuum. They both describe any unjust or unwarranted exertion of power; any action that causes harm by way of violating rights. The point of the abuse is to achieve compliance from or control over the victim. Several types of interpersonal violence are:

Physical abuse -- hitting; choking; pushing; stopping you from leaving; pulling your hair; throwing things at you; use of a weapon against you; stalking you; preventing you from sleeping.

Psychological and emotional abuse -- threats of violence to you, your children or your pets; harming your possessions; isolating you from your support systems; threatening you with a weapon; threatening your friends and coworkers; insulting and humiliating you; verbally attacking you.

Sexual abuse -- criticizing you sexually; forcing you to have sex; withholding sex; treating you as a sex object; accusing you of having affairs.

Economic abuse -- forcing you to quit your job; not letting you have your name on the family checking account; destroying or stealing joint assets; refusing to pay bills.

The facts about relationship violence:

By the age of 20, 33% of all young women will experience some form of dating violence.

In most violent relationships (72-77%), physical violence occurs only after the couple has become seriously involved, is engaged, or is living together.

In one emergency room study, 42% of female trauma victims between the ages of 18-20 were injured due to relationship violence.

Studies indicate that anywhere from 10-32% of women seeking prenatal health care have a past history of relationship violence.

Cues to notice:

• A fear of disagreeing with your partner.

• Your partner tries to make all your decisions.

• Your partner's temper scares you.

• You find yourself apologizing for your partner's

• behavior.

• Your partner is extremely possessive or jealous.

• Your partner uses threats to control you.

• Your partner undermines your abilities to rely on yourself.

• You partner tries to limit your contacts with friends or family.

• Your partner has forced unwanted sex on you.

• Your partner purposefully damages your possessions.

• Your partner is charming around others but abusive to you.

If you are in a violent relationship:

People have many reasons for staying in violent or abusive relationships, including fear of or feelings for the abuser. Whether you stay or go, it is a good idea to develop a plan to increase your safety. That plan may include the following:

Contacting the VOICE Center, 994-7069, or The Network Against Sexual and Domestic Abuse, 586-4111, to discuss your situation and available options.

• Putting away cash or credit cards in a safe, accessible place.

• Hiding a set of car keys in case you need to get away quickly.

• Deciding where you will go if the relationship becomes dangerous and you need to get out. The Battered Women's Network operates a shelter for this purpose, or you may make arrangements with a friend or family member.

• Calling The Network's Legal Advocate, 582-2038, about getting a Temporary Order of Protection.

• Developing a plan for contacting the police or campus security: a signal system with your neighbor, roommate, RA, or other person who lives near you and you trust.

• Reminding yourself to get out when you are in danger. Remember, it is ok to change your mind: you may want to stay today, but change your mind tomorrow. You may want to leave the relationship today, but decide to go back tomorrow. Advocates from the VOICE Center and The Network will support you in whatever choice you make.

Remember: domestic violence is against the law. VOICE Center Advocates can discuss reporting options with you.

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14 Things Men Can Do to End Sexual Harassment of Women

1. Do not tell demeaning jokes about women, and confront men who do.

2. Take responsibility to know what is appropriate or not appropriate behavior is not women's responsibility to set limits on your behavior. Ask if you are unsure.

3. Educate yourself and other men. Read books, listen to and believe women.

4. Don't assume that what is funny or non-threatening to you is funny and non-threatening to her.

5. Ask before touching anyone. Double check if you are still unsure.

6. Get involved. Confront your friends about their behavior. File a complaint if you witness harassment.

7. Review your own behaviors honestly. Examine your attitudes about women.

8. Acknowledge that sexual harassment is an abuse of power, and is perpetuated by male privilege.

9. Write or call legislators and representatives to support legislation that protects against sexual harassment. Support candidates who support anti-harassment reforms.

10. Write letters to the editor.

11. Organize men to protest and be active against sexism, violence, and harassment against women.

12. Support women's organizations and shelters, and women-supportive businesses in whatever ways you can.

13. Support and stand up for women, even in the face of criticism from others. Support other men who treat women respectfully.

14. Teach your children to respect others and to be assertive (not aggressive).

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Myths Surrounding Sexual and Relationship Violence

Alcohol causes violence. Although it is often present in rape or domestic abuse, alcohol does not cause violence; many people drink without assaulting or attacking another person.

Stress causes battering. Obviously, some batterers experience stress, but stress does not cause abuse. Many people under severe stress do not batter.

A woman who goes to a man's room after a date should understand that her date expects to have sex. Consenting to go to someone's room does not translate into agreeing to have sex.

"Real" rape only happens when a stranger attacks a woman. 85% of all rapes are committed by someone the victim knows; 57% of rapes happen on dates.

Gay men rape men. 98% of male rape survivors are assaulted by a male who self-identifies as heterosexual.

You can't be raped by a partner or husband. 50% of rape victims over 30 are raped by a partner or ex-partner. Marital rape is illegal in the state of Montana.

If s/he agrees to some degree of sexual intimacy, s/he wants to have intercourse. If s/he agrees to some form of sexual intimacy, that is all s/he has agreed to. The assumption that a person wants to "go farther" needs to be clarified verbally. Both parties have the right to change their minds at anytime.

Many women lie about being sexually assaulted.
Since there is such a stigma attached to being a sexual assault survivor, and since survivors are so often blamed for their assault, rape is rarely falsely reported, and, in fact, is widely underreported. Government estimates have found that anywhere from 3 to 10 assaults are committed for every one that is reported. False report rapes for rape are 25%; the same as the false report rate for other violent crimes.

Some women don't mind being hit; otherwise they would break up with a partner who is violent. The reasons a person stays in a violent situation are many and complex. They may include:

• Fear of leaving

• Feelings of embarrassment and isolation

• She loves her partner and hopes he will change

• She is economically dependent on him

• She thinks her children need a father

Rape is an impulsive act. Anywhere from 57% to 71% of rapes are clearly planned.

For more information contact the VOICE center

370 Strand Union Building (SUB) or call 994-7069

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What Students Need to Know about Sexual and Relationship Violence

There are ways for all of us to make the campus a safer community with respect to sexual and domestic violence. Safe behaviors include:

• Using peer pressure to stop behaviors that may lead to acquaintance rape. For example, when hearing someone talk about taking advantage of a partner sexually, let them know you think this is wrong. Silence can be mistaken as approval.

• Support your friends...don't pressure them when they are unsure about a situation. If a friend asks you to leave with her from a party because she is uncomfortable, help her out.

• Know what behaviors constitute rape. It is never ok to force yourself onto a person who does not want to have sex with you, even if:

  • You have had sex with the person in the past

  • You paid throughout the evening.

  • S/he says "yes" then changes her/his mind.

  • You think s/he has been leading you on.

• Know that "force" in a sexual assault can include threat of force, retaliation, or emotional coercion, as well as physical force.

• Treat your partner in the same way you would want to be treated.

• Trust your instincts. If something feels wrong, it probably is.

• Drink responsibly. Most acquaintance rapes happen when one or both parties are drunk or high; legally, this is not an excuse. If you have sex with someone who is unable to consent (for example, because s/he is very drunk or passed out), having sex with her/him is rape.

• Challenge sexist attitudes and behaviors, such as jokes, comments and gestures.

Remember:

• Nobody asks for or deserves rape.

• Victims do not cause rape; rapists cause rape.

• Submission to a rapist out of fear or violence is not consent and does not imply failure on the part of the victim.

What to do if someone you know is the victim of sexual or relationship violence

Believe her or him. In one study of rape victims, 42% of victims told no one about the assault; only 5% told the police and 5% told rape crisis centers. One of the main reasons people give for not reporting is fear that they will not be believed.

Be a good listener. Let the person tell as much or as little of the story as they want.

Don't tell her or him what you would have done; ask her or him why s/he didn't scream, fight, run, etc.

Tell her or him that the assault or abuse was not her/his fault. No one asks for or deserves to be assaulted or abused.

Help her or him find a safe place to stay.

Assist the survivor in getting what s/he needs and wants. This may mean providing phone numbers, information, transportation, etc. If the survivor wants an advocate to talk or to accompany her in medical and legal processes, she can call the VOICE Center, 994-7069 or the Help Center, 586-3333.

Let the survivor make decisions about what s/he wants to do, even if you disagree with those decisions. This is an important step for the survivor as a means of regaining control and overcoming feelings of helplessness.

Learn about sexual and domestic violence, its effect on victims, and resources in your community. This will make it easier for you to support the victim without blaming or judging her or him. The concern you show in your desire to be informed may also help the victim feel supported.

For more information call the MSU-Bozeman VOICE Center, 994-7069.

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Return to regular view	Text-only	Updated: 12/18/2008